Internetto Price Wars, Hairbrushed from History by Bookface, Down amongst The Z Celebs, Professor In Custardy. People urged to Calm Down-Calm Down!

Public Announcement From the Bloggit Bureau

The 5th plenum of the Anti State Activities Bureau of The Peoples Repugnant Of Grotty Cash, has issued a warrant for the arrest and execution (insert “trial” ed.) of the infamous blogsterist and impostor, Pete Price.

This impostor, who has dared to mock our celebrated Ambassador to HollyOaks, the voice of the people against a rising tide of vile no-marks and moral decline, a man who is the very rubber soul of our party, will not be allowed to continue in his anti panto activities.

The Beijingo Authorities continue to close in on the dissident Bloggers in and around Grotty Cash Province, who seek to challenge the ideas of the Great Custard Revolution and the official party line. High on the list are Price, Terry Blame's blogs, The Scribbling on a Jotter Over Muesli blog and of course the infamous Toby Porridge. The authorities have immediately removed all trace of Price from the Bookface social not-working site and asked that people remain calm.

Following the Peoples Long March and the even longer April, there has been an increase in dissident activity, inspired by the self-styled Sub-Cult Leader and instigator of The Great Leak Forwarded, the Urbane Guerrilla, Toby Porridge47.

Porridge is suspected of being a follower of the former revolutionary leader, who was one time ally of Cuban President, Filo Pastro, before becoming the iconic and ubiquitous subject of student bedroom pin-up posters the world over, Che Ken Stevens.

Porridge is also known to be connected to the Anti Cuban Heel movement that lead to the downfall of the much loved little batista, regime of General Diddy Henochet. Since then, Porridge has launched direct attacks on the government of President Juan Peroni, and continues to attack the authority of the administration using the vile tactics of truth and public accountability.

The Bloggit Bureau is pleased to announce that following a successful operation earlier, the blogsterist known as Professor Yaffle Chucklebutty has been arrested and detained. The Official Custard Bureau has now taken control of the blogsite.

A spokesman for the local governing administration said, at the moment the leader has little intelligence.

We hope to learn more as interrogation gets underway. The leader was informed that the name Chucklebutty is thought to be fictitious and that he may be using a pseudonym. On hearing this news, the leader wasted no time and issued an immediate arrest warrant for Sue Denham, who is now safely under lock and key protesting her innocence along with 17 others of the same name.

Although the arrest operation was a hailed a success, as a handcuffed Chucklebutty emerged from his shed after having thrown out two soviet manufactured AK47 tickling sticks to waiting troops, over 130 officers were seriously injured in the failed attempt to remove Mrs Chucklebutty.

Unfortunately, on entering the house, troops interrupted Mrs Chucklebutty, during an edition of "Cash In The Attic", when she is known to be at her most volatile. She is expected to be charged later for assault and criminal damage to several tanks.

Mrs Chucklebutty puts on a brave smile

She and a Mr Clack from a local key cutting shop, was later spotted outside of the detention centre where her husband is being held, as they mounted a vigil calling for his release. The vigil was however cut short after five minutes when it began to drizzle, at which point she gave a defiant cry of, “oh f*** this for a lark” and they both left.

Under the new anti blogger laws, Chucklebutty can be held for no longer than 42 years before a magistrates order is required to continue the remand period and allow for further questioning.

In the meantime, it has emerged that the impostor Price has recommenced his vile blog site and in an act of defiance to the authorities played a special request song on his radio show in support of Chucklebutty. “I wouldn’t leave My Little Yellow Blog for You”

The song is already being talked about in music circles as potentially reaching this years Christmas number one hundred and seventy eight spot and a cover version is being recorded by Chucklebutty’s alleged favourite band, The Jam.

The Capital Of Custard Blog site has now formally been taken over by the official Custard Bureau and a new author and guide to the remainder of this glorious year in our history has been appointed.

In future, the site will provide a source of serious information and truthful debate about the magnificent programme of events, the wise and careful planning, the triumph of publicity, the strong, accountable and inspirational leadership, the strict and transparent financial control that has been applied to the year, and the final cost to the taxpayer.

The people of this great city will welcome and rejoice in the additional cost to their council tax bills and the cuts in their services. The people will see this as their very own contribution to Capital of Custard year, ensuring that all of our citizens are or have the opportunity to be involved. Assuming we can ever collect the council tax.

This Blog site has now been handed over to our newly appointed author, who will now produce a genuine Official Guide to Liverpool Capital of Custard 2008. A man with a heart as big as Liverpool a truly big hearted author and a much loved son of the city, Mr Arthur Askey.

Hello Playmates!

You all know me, big hearted Arthur they caaaaall me, Ayethenkyou. Well I dunno playmates, most of this goes over my head, here, less of that now. As you know, I’ve been in the business since eighteen hundred and frozen to death, I have worked with all the greats Houdini, Blondini, MacEIllhinie, I even remember Little Titch, long before he was knighted and ran off with all the knights takings. He was one of those acts that used to come on stage and prance about in ridiculously over sized heels while he raked himself a fortune.

But what a marvellous and well managed year this has been, it says here. Thanks to the vision of our next Lord Mayor…who? You’re joking. Ey, somebody’s having a laugh here. I'm Big-hearted Arthur not big halfwit Arthur, you don’t expect me to say this tripe do you? No, no, no, I’ll just do the Bee song and I’m off. No you’ll have to get somebody else, try Jeffrey Archer, he could be your Mayor as well.

Ayethenkyou .

The Bee Song http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=2rpBAZEVHmI